A Look into my Everyday Hartbags (Art Handbags) & Journals

Hi guys, a quick video post today to share a peek at my everyday Hartbags & take around journals. 

Click on the image to be taken to Youtube, enjoy:

Do you have a Hartbag or take around journals?

Share in the Gallery on Journal Workshops.

Creative Hangover

I'm bouncing off of the walls. I'm elated. I'm exhausted. I'm figuring out what's what. I'm having trouble focusing.

I've had an incredible week, an incredibly creative week. 

It's wonderful, beautiful things are happening. I can't tell you what they'll turn into yet...I've no idea.

I only ever feel this way, this INSANELY creative intense way, may be once or twice a year. 

It's delightful, and glorious, and wonderfully surprising, and humbling, and exciting, and blissful. It's also all encompassing, and addictive, and inconsiderate, and reckless, and completely draining. 

The past three nights I have had may be four hours sleep total. The intensity threatens to deny any and every peaceful second that may so happen to stumble unsuspecting upon my path.

So tonight I'm going to give it a limited time and tell my creativity 'once that times gone, so am I'. 

'I'm off to watch a movie and paint my nails and think on things NOT related to you, so please be good and respect my boundaries. You may continue to work on things, but please keep them to yourself until tomorrow.'

It's bizarre to me that we could ever need a self-care hiatus from something that fills us up so completely as what our creativity does. But creativity comes in many forms - sometimes it's the thing that IS the hiatus as we knit, or glue & stick, or paint away our crappy days. Other times it's the thing that pokes us awake again at 4am after it's only just let us close our eyes.

So I'm curious what other peoples replenishing self care practices are (whether to give yourself a break from creative rampages or something else). Share below if you want, a recent one of mine, believe it or not, is bird watching...those happy little chirpers going about their day relaxes me completely! Actually now I come to think of it I think that's one I've always had, but then it's only when you really need these practices you realise how useful they are (much like journaling itself).

As I don't have any goodies yet to share despite how busy I've been this week this is an old pic, but you can click on the image if you want to see the video on me painting it.

Have a great weekend

PS there's three days left to join the new Art Swap that's happening on Journal Workshops. Click the image below to get sending and receiving some fab art 

(it's free, go on get swappin')

Shadow Work Journaling – My Biggest Project This Year

Last night I made a discovery in my journal. I realised a lot of things, mainly why I’ve felt a lot of resistance to creativity….2015 has been the year I’ve done a lot of, what some people call, ‘shadow work’. 

Essentially I’ve spent more time looking at areas within myself that play a part in holding myself back, even sabotaging myself & my creative endeavours. The main reason why I’ve been doing this is as a reaction to the fact that they have been popping up all on their own – Jenny the Procrastinator, Jenny the Fed-up, Jenny the Fearful, Jenny the Lazy, Jenny the Angry, Jenny the had a Bloody Nuff - they’ve all been tea-guests recently! And I’ve learnt, thanks to a lot of journaling, that if you don’t compassionately identify with all of these (so-called) ‘ugly’ parts of yourself when they arise, then they will still arise, just not as your allies! 

Jenny the Sullen

We tend to look at these areas of ourselves as problematic, or even as the problem – for example ‘oh if only Jenny the Procrastinator would get out of the bloody way I could just get on and do this project’. But really, out of cause and effect these ‘shadow’ sides are never the cause, they are the effect; they are the by product, the response our personalities have to whatever the problem actually is. Think about it, there are thousands of reasons why we procrastinate – worry over what others will think, worry over whether we are good enough to fulfil our vision, fear of failure, fear of success and on and on it goes. Procrastination is not the problem (though it may feel like it at the time), it is the response to all the other problems (real or imagined) that are popping up around our projects. 

So getting to know my shadow sides has been the biggest project I have really done this year, and when I consider all the other projects I intended to do but am very behind on, my discovery last night that this is what I’ve actually been doing (& not just ‘flapping around’ as previously thought) makes a lot of things clearer, and easier! I now have a foothold, an understanding, a way to move forward.

tonights page - done by Jenny the Lazy

So if you've had the 'wading the treacle' feeling as I often call it (aka the 'I'm trying so hard and getting nowhere' feeling) recently yourself and want a journaling exercise to do this weekend that may just be illuminating ask yourself, & do some art around, these things: 

What areas of yourself have you may be looked at as problematic, or tried to hide behind the ‘good' parts, or ignored completely? 

And if you were to look at it differently & see it as an effect instead of a problem what might it actually be handing you a golden torch to look into?

If you're brave enough look into this I'd love to hear your findings below, feel free to share 

& have a happy journaling abundant weekend

Come be a part of my gorgeous Art Community:

 Journal Workshops:

(New Art Swap happening in 3 days, come join in!!!)

TWO New Videos... and TWO (free right now) Must See Movies for Artists

Hi guys

I bring you two new videos today, one I just finished editing and the other I just finished recording (haha nothing like being prepared hey?).

The first video is relating to a question that got asked recently on my current giveaway post on Journal Workshops; 

Ways to Deal with Creative Overwhelm and Idea Paralysis.

Here's the off the cuff, coffee chat type video. 

Grab a cuppa and relax:

The second video I *just* did, again off the cuff (yep, I'm developing a theme in how I work nowadays I think lol) to tackle the issue of resistance, particularly that has come up around the new Monthly Challenge with several Journal Workshops members:

Openly Visiting with Resistance in this Challenge

If you haven't seen the new challenge, don't worry still click the video link above (or the image) and it will take you to the page where the original Monthly Challenge, and this new video, are both held.

Okay onto the movies, which isn't something I would normally write about in a blogpost but these just had my artistic senses tingling so as both free right now online (but only for a few days so ensure you carve out some me time asap if either calls to you) I thought I would share them here.

The first is 'That Day We Sang' available on BBC iplayer for 15 more days. Unfortunately I have no clue how bbc iplayer works around the world, I'm just hoping it will work for everyone but I know some video sharing sites don't always work that way, so I'm sorry if this is the case for your country & I've just dangled a carrot lol. If it is working though then you are in for a TREAT! It is a musical (a distinctly British musical) set in Manchester in 1929 and 1969 - the sets are FABULOUS, the writing GLORIOUS (written by Victoria Wood, who has been writing amazing comedy since before I was born in case you don't already know her) and acting SUPERB (Imelda Staunton, who is one of my favourite actresses and Michael Ball, who surprised me very much - in a good way, head the cast). It is a feast for the eyes, emotions and as I said before your artistic senses. It's a film you cannot help but appreciate as total work of art, enjoy:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b04w7sp3/that-day-we-sang

The second is being shared by Hay House for free just for a couple more days in honour of Dr Wayne Dyer, who died last weekend. It's 'The Shift', starring Dr Wayne Dyer, based on his teachings and it feeds your artistic senses in a very different way to the one above - it does have beautiful sets too, and good acting, but it is more about understanding the reason why we do art on a deeper level in the first place: our connection with Source. If like me you have listened to/read Dr Dyer for years then there probably isn't anything you haven't already heard before in this, but it's still nice to receive it in an artistic format rather than a lecture or a book. I don't often talk about how making art has become more of a spiritual practice to me in recent years, but it has & it feeds my work so much more than what just trying to 'do it alone' ever could. If you feel you might need to nourish your spiritual creative practice then this is a good place to set some time aside for and start:

http://www.drwaynedyer.com/the-shift-movie-watch-now

That's all for this ramble, 

Have a happy (& artistically nourished) weekend =)

PS I'm giving away some of my painted pebbles and my Bumper Bundle of Goodies (limited number currently available via Etsy) below in the giveaway on Journal Workshops, winners picked 7th Sept 2015 so get your name in now:

Journal Workshops Giveaway (< link)

What a visit with a Fake Famous Artist Taught Me About My Creative Dragons

Hello lovelies

So I know I’ve been a bit awol from here, and anywhere online for that matter, for the past few weeks. It started with a roadtrip to the Lake District (pictures at bottom of post, it is such a beautiful place) but won’t be ended with being described here…perhaps I’ll do that in this months newsletter which is due to go out in a few days, but right here right now this post will be long enough without it so I just want to drive straight into a really crazy world and what it can teach you.

Last night I dreamt that I visited a famous artist in his mega huge studio. The space looked suspiciously like Picasso’s studio from a picture I once saw when a young Bridgette Bardot visited it, but the man himself was not recognisable in any way. He was certainly not modelled of off any real famous artist I know, the nearest he came to being identifiable to me was that he had the same stature as a friend I had when I worked in the construction industry (yep, I worked in construction, aren’t I just full of surprises?), the only real difference was that the dream didn’t really give him any facial features and he was in a wheelchair.

The studio itself was higgledy piggledy in a way only a really old building can be due to extensions and renovations being added here and there over the centuries. To make up for this wheelchair ramps where obviously purchased in bulk to accommodate the different floor levels. Long Persian rugs were placed on the stone floor between his different work areas for him to travel across smoothly. He was quite pleased to see me and the first area he took me to was a place where he did his metal art. There were wooden bases (imagine apple crates) on tables containing a great deal of beautiful metal art, which had the same kind of shape as road signage (one sign held up by two poles, one at each end). They were standing up like folding chairs would if they were folded and lined up with the back of one chair to the front of another, so that you could almost flip through them like you can art prints on a stand in a shop. It defies physics of course to be able to have lots of top heavy metal signage standing upright with only a shallow wooden base holding them so but obviously the dream world laughs in the face of silly things like the law of physics.

The faces of the metal art were beautiful; multi-coloured, textured and they had huge patches of glitter which were ran through in the middle, which I determined was where he put huge lines of glorious glitter paint (that unfortunately isn’t available in real life – not even the best glitter paint could touch it) and went over it with his wheelchair, so that the paint oozed out either side of the wheel tracks to add even more texture. But there were crates upon crates upon crates of the stuff, so I asked him ‘what are you going to do with all these?’. He shrugged. For some reason in dream land there was not an opinion for him to sell or trade or exhibit them, there was only an option to ‘do’ something with them – like turn them into one larger installation piece or something, which he didn’t want to do. As he made them daily and they were just stacking up doing nothing I asked ‘shouldn’t you stop doing them then, and work on something else instead?’ He simply said ‘they make me happy’ as if this answered it utterly and completely.

The next area he moved me onto was a group of chairs where he stood holding a small notebook. Notice I say stood, there was no wheelchair anymore and he carried on as if there never had been. He started to explain to me that the notebook was filled over and over again with just one word – ‘Scarborough’ (I’ve still no idea why that one word) and when I asked why he said ‘my mate looked at it then exclaimed ‘well, at least I know you’re consistent’’, again as if that confusing and frustrating response answered the question.

It became increasingly clear to me that I had come to visit this man because he had written a hugely successful musical film, in that way dreams can totally change their direction/storyline without you being any the wiser, and he took me to the computer/music studio area where he wrote the score. There was absolutely no question in the dream as to why he shouldn’t be a famous producer of musical films, as well as famous artist in the painterly fashion…he was perhaps a famous photographer, a celebrity chef and a host of his own reality show too. But then the dream took on a different feel and suddenly I was no longer wanted. The artist turned his back on me and waved his hand for me to exit. To leave without any kind of ceremony of goodbyes hurt my feelings but then I woke, and I realised what it was all about and how this dream had tackled several hidden dragons that have been coming up for me lately around my creativity.

For instance my recent lack of online communications has, in part, been due to me not knowing what I should be posting while dealing with a recent creative block. The block itself wasn’t a traditional one, where I stopped creating altogether, it was one where I didn’t know what I ‘should’ be doing or posting to the wider world when all I really wanted to do was lock the door and paint a rock (…I’ve been painting pebbles) or box (and junk journaling) without the requirement of thought, pictures or social media. The artists opinion of his metal art & the stacks of ‘surplus’ metal art in this dream were there to slay that dragon and tell me that creating for the sake of creating is enough.

painting pebbles

Another dragon, which I just discussed with a friend today, is a fear or a block I’ve created around consistency – as my recent absence may show. People often ask me when my next video, zine or whatever is, which makes me feel great that people care but also when I feel like I have to be consistent it clams me up, and makes inspiration a scarce thing. The artists notebook that filled with a single word over and over is slaying the dragon that says consistency has to be hard, or pressure filled. It’s telling me tiny consistent actions add up. My job is not to fill up the whole notebook straight away, my job right here, right now is just that next word.

The artist becoming a famous musical producer addressed a dragon I’ve been thinking a lot about very recently. This past week I have started creatively writing again. It is something I used to do quite a lot, but my sudden immersion into it seemed to come out of nowhere and while I was feeling so creatively up in the air I wondered if I shouldn’t be dedicating that time to something ‘better’. ‘This is frivolous’ the dragon said ‘you don’t know what you want to do in your art right now so you just sit staring at a word document? You’re wasting precious time get on with something useful!’ The sudden appearance of this musical film in the middle of the dream I am sure was telling me DIVERSITY IS GOOD! It is required. That working on one creative output, even if totally nothing to do with any others, can actually help fuel those others. It can keep you fresh and more fulfilled to follow those routes that make your heart sing, so shut up dragon this is for the good of both of us!

The ending of the dream, the way I was so very wounded by how he turned his back on me, instantly registered what dragon that was slaying as soon as I woke up. It represented how much it hurts me when I turn my back on my art. When I allow fear, or blocks (which I think are just fear/resistance at their root) to dictate to my artist path it is a painful smack in the face, or creative gut (whichever hurts more!). My creative consistency of doing every word at a time will be the true slaying of this dragon.

Finally the meaning the wheelchair/the wheelchair disappearing represented I figured out last. It was a comical light bulb moment when I recognised the wheelchair disappearing was representing the actual act of me realising what all those above things mean - and how recognising all this was giving me the strength to stop impairing myself creatively. More literally I think the wheelchair may have been a dragon itself, meaning when you can identify a dragon then you can work on making it disappear. Unfortunately it doesn't mean once you've identified it it will just go poof, a lot of our dragons are very deep rooted and it can take a lot of work. Sometimes you will even think you have slayed your dragon and be totally unsuspecting that it has spouted another head and is just lying in wait to get you another time. So I don’t think that I have slayed all these dragons for good, but for now I have done the best I can. I have acknowledged them, found solutions for dealing with them or found room for them at my table if they haven’t got a solution yet. Knowing your dragons means you can have more power to control them, rather than the other way around.

So what would your non-existent famous dreamland artist show you about your dragons?

If you have read this whole post God Bless you! I don’t think I have ever written a longer one, thank you!

PS As promised here are pics of the my recent surroundings:

Derwent Pencil Museum 

isn't it gorgeous???

PPS My new Art Challenge Video is going to be created over the weekend, it'll be live on the first in our fabulous Monthly Challenge Group:

Click the image below to join the group and access a year and a half's worth of archived goodies waiting for you:

See you there, paintbrush in hand!!

The process (really) works!

'Is a good idea worth a sleepless night?' is what I wrote in my journal at 3am this morning. By 6am I think I had an answer.

After last weeks post 'At the Crossroads' (...of Idea Junction) I was telling myself, and hearing from others, the same things we always tell one another when we get overwhelmed by 'too many ideas, not enough time' syndrome - you know the sort of stuff like 'relax', 'it'll work out', 'breathe', 'you'll know what to do', 'have faith in the process'. 

My brain knows all this of course...but what the brain knows, isn't always what the brain knows....if you know what I mean. 

There's a wrestle between the logical part of me that knows it'll sort itself out if left alone and the part of me that wants to get moving. But you see the past few weeks....oh boy...the past few weeks have contained SO many new ideas coming in & I get energy with every single new idea, they all scream 'do me NOW'. I'm sure you know what I mean here, every new idea is the best idea in the world....and a few minutes later this even newer idea is now the best idea in the world. But I need to remember...

Just because a new idea has energy, doesn't mean it has THE energy to be the next project.

However this idea, the one from 3am....or 1am...or 5am...or 7am...well it does HORRAY! This new project not only has the shiny new 'best idea in the world' energy, it is the real McCoy. And yet again I have re-learnt that

The process works! 

If you relax and breathe and have faith in the process it will work out and you will know what to do!

I do of course still 'get' that part of myself that wants to get moving. It has been a full week since my last frustrated blogpost, and even longer since I've been frustrated, processes take time! So I suppose faith really is the key to chillaxing into the knowing that something will show itself to be The-Harry-Potter-Chosen-One path for you to take.

So I'm off on my new path, of course though it is THE one it doesn't mean it's the only path I'm walking. I have art supplies and notes left all over so many idea paths (thank goodness I'm the only one who walks them so they don't get run over). 

I hope the path you're on is going as well. My immediate path tonight is editing the new Monthly Challenge video, the art of which I just finished creating, here's a sneaky peek:

re on is going as we It will be uploaded [here] tomorrow...if I ever get round to editing it....hmmm I'd better go do that really, ciao bella!

At the Crossroads

I look left

Then I look right

Then I look left again and realise the road has forked at the point I stand, the left side now has a left left and a right left road.

I look right, and see a left right and a right right and realise the same thing has happened there.

I exhale, flapping my lips so fast I make a raspberry noise and look straight ahead to see two roads have appeared there.

I close my eyes in exhaustion. I dare not look left, nor right, nor behind me, for I know what will happen if I do.

Where am I? 

I'm at idea junction of course

....someone please give me a ride on your bicycle

& take me wherever you may, 

the decision resting on me to choose is making me miss all the scenery!

oh, to be a well loved dog
 ....with a plethora of cushions

Bunch of Backgrounds (Take Two)

So lately all I can be bothered to create journaling wise is backgrounds...you ever feel like this?

Much like I did half way through the Monthly Challenge video - using the same altered book too (click here if you haven't seen it: http://journalworkshops.ning.com/group/monthly-challenge/forum/topics/july-2015)

And they're taking me a while too, this one above for instance took two or three visits to the table.

Apart from journaling I did share this little make below on facebook yesterday of using jewellery box inserts as mini recycled canvases:

But as I'm really feeling the backgrounds I'm just going with it. I'm really enjoying the slowness of it too, as I normally journal so quick taking my time and coming back to pages is a nice change of page. So on I'm gonna crack with a bunch of backgrounds, here is a video I did titled the same if you feel like some background play too, much love and happy weekend xoxo